If You are Hurting You are Not Alone

Find hope in our human connection

Photo by Marc-Olivier Jodoin on Unsplash

If you are hurting, you are not alone. If you are hurting, then I am there with you. We may not know each other, but we can look up at the same sky carrying the same pain, and maybe somehow we can carry each other.


I sat outside under the stars tonight as someone I love bore their soul to me. Through tears and an elevating voice, they did their best to express all of their fears, doubts and hurts and the toll they have taken on their life. My heart broke as I recognized these rantings, for their pain sounded like mine.

Themes of self-doubt and self-loathing, feeling unvalued and unneeded, feeling like we don’t matter; these are devastating burdens to bear, and difficult to overcome. Her tears are my tears because we are connected. Her pain is my pain because we are connected.

What would you tell someone who was experiencing the same pain as you?

I could not erase her pain, and I could not solve her problems, because I have not figured out mine yet. What I did was shower her with an affirmation of her goodness and ensured her of my love for her.

As I sit here tonight, sleep eludes me, and I wonder if I can offer that same love and affirmation to myself that I offered to my loved one? Love yourself, that is the starting point. This love is not rooted in vanity, rather it is a proclamation that we are lovers and we must love ourselves to rightly love others.

I turn to the Bible for inspiration and help sometimes, and Mark 12:31 says to love your neighbor as yourself. Even in the Bible self care is the foundation for living a life of love. Loving myself is the foundation for me to love others.


If you are hurting, you are not alone. If you are hurting, then I am there with you. We may not know each other, but we can look up at the same sky carrying the same pain, and maybe somehow we can carry each other.

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